The attainment of success and realization of worthwhile dreams and goals more often than not is directly proportional to the quality of our associations/relationships. “Show me your friend and I will tell you who you are” is really a statement of fact.
I have seen highly motivated and power-FULL individuals become power-LESS through energy draining and life sucking relationships.
“Some of us are sleeping with the enemy” – Brian Beane
Yes. Some of us are sleeping with the enemy of our progress, our dreams and our goals disguised/masqueraded as spouses. I have met young, idealistic and talented dreamers whose passion have been suffocated and sabotaged in the name of marriage.
“I don’t want it in this house. Period” he says with no justifiable reason(s) whatsoever. This display of ignorance laced with inferiority complex tends to prove nothing but an unwarranted show of masculinity. I am the man of the house. And I begin to wonder what happened to my little understanding of marriage which should be an agreement between two consenting adults to go through the journey called life together.
One person is trying to do something that will improve the quality of life of the family and the other person says NO which comes from a filthy lens with which he/she sees the world.
Well, what do I know? Some of the victims will say ” you won’t understand” and they are absolutely right. I really don’t understand why I should be living with someone who doesn’t support my dreams. It’s a very big error that should be avoided at all cost. She nags and blackmail you with everything she has got just to pull you down to her parochial and shallow minded level.
This reminds of a little survey I conducted with some of my female students a year ago. I randomly selected them and asked them one simple question with hydra headed answers. The question was, “where do you see yourself in the next 10 years?”Over 80% of them started with “I will be in my husbands house” before talking about their dreams and goals which was the answer I was looking for. You see, they all have dreams but focus on marriage first and end up sleeping with the enemy. If they had focused on their dreams first, then the person that will come their way must be filtered through the lens of their dreams. That person must be in alignment or in support of their dreams, pure and simple.
Are you sleeping with the enemy already? If the relationship isn’t cemented with marriage yet, you have a chance to take a stand and straighten things out now. If it has been consummated in marriage already, then make it your life’s work to make him/her understand. Lack of understanding is usually the problem in most relationships. Don’t stop looking for ways to make your spouse understand that whatever you are trying to do is for the benefit and functionality of the family.